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Thursday, December 17, 2009

lost claus

So I was walking Flo last week in the park
and in the distance I see a lone figure approaching.


He looked a bit like this:



Seen any kids? He asked me.

- No.


Long Pause.


Is there a car-park anywhere around?

- On the other side of the creek.

He sighed and hobbled away.
 

12 comments:

genevieve said...

Right down Santa Claus lane, weren't you. (Is that a real song, or did they just invent it for About A Boy?)

A Santa at Bunnings tried to give me a lollipop the other day just because I said hello. One might have called him 'a bit fresh', once upon a time.

Ann ODyne said...

When I was a small child Sandy Claws suits seemed terrifying, but I guess kids these days are inured to horror by all the scary FTA TV they see.

Jingle Bell Rock (the registers)

boynton said...

fresh santas in bulk...

Though the santa I encountered was less fresh and more disoreintated/world-weary.

Yes Ann, the commercial claws scared me as well.

genevieve said...

Have consulted the family, my son thinks Santa should have had his mobile with him.

genevieve said...

...I think the extended family's verdict would be that he needed a GPS (that's what they are, isn't it, those map things. Lucky I'm not Santa isn't it.)

BwcaBrownie said...

right now in New York City there are mass Santa gatherings. I know this from photos at my pal www.Jezblog.com who was warned by the police when he photographed them shoving a Santa.
All the other Santas were yelling "run! run!"
I guess they mass by cellphone alerts. 5000 apparently.
link from memory

BwcaBrownie said...

From Jez Coulson's image 1021 -
"Well Santacon of course has a few problems when 5000 Santas go out to get hammered there are bound to be problems......... here we see a Santa being ticketed for no good reason that I could discern....... the cops were very peculiar on this event........ when there were 5000 Santas together in Washington Sq partying ...... getting high..... drinking..... going in for incredibly dangerous drunken crowd surfing...... No cops could be seen...... none came..... none ever entered the park while all that craziness reigned...... but if an individual Santa away from the main crowd...... stepped off the curb in a way that the cops didn't like they were down on him like a ton of bricks in a totally arbitary way.....?
When I tried to photograph this arrest the police in the following vehicle had a fit..... "If you take another photo you will be arrested"........ "Move away before we arrest you" ..... "Its illegal to take photos of police activity"......... hmmmmm ........ Im sure the last bit is a lie...... the other two are probably true they would arrest you....... clearly they can't charge you with taking a photograph because it is not illegal........ but what they always do is charge you with obstruction....... this is a catch all police thing....... we make it up as we go along and anyway we can always charge you with obstruction cos thats just the thing we do if we have arrested you for something that is not illegal........

Here are cops in Britain falling back on the we will arrest you for obstruction threat after thinking of arresting a Guardian reporter for having a camera.............. Guardian

The other Santas you cannot see in the picture were calling to the arrested Santa....... 'Run Santa Run!"

Cheers Jez XXXXXXX

www.jezblog.com

boynton said...

G: or a tom tom?
(I reckon that's as high tech as that Santa could go...)

Thanks BWCA. I love the next photo
http://www.jezblog.com/index.php?showimage=1022

Armagnac Daddy said...

There is so much to take from this tale.

Bear would have been stunned.

boynton said...

Cheers, Armagnac.

(What I failed to communicate also was that the setting looked rather fairy-tale like, given the greener than average parkland this year)

Helen said...

Poor Santa, I identify with his overworked ass.

Hope you had a good one, Boynton!

boynton said...

Lost and weary might be the santa of the times.

Thanks Helen - hope yours was happy.